When I originally began to pen this blog it was essentially about cooking and the difference between the cooking programmes and the reality of cooking at home. I am sorry to say that there has been a sinister twist that quiet frankly upset me, I will deal with this later.

As we all know there is no television channel out there that does'nt have a cooking programme, be it "The F Word" with Gordon Ramsey or Ready Steady Cook. I like to cook and occasionally watch these programmes to get different ideas to try and vary meal time. Whilst watching I have noticed something that really annoys me, its the chefs ability to find everything that they are looking for. You never see Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsey or other celebrity chefs rattling around in a drawer looking for a knife,tin opener or any other kitchen utensil, its always to hand.

Additionally have you ever noticed just how clean everything is when they are finished, there is no mess. When I cook I leave a trail of food debris across the floor and worktop. When the food is cooking it usually takes me as long again to clean up, you never see this on the television.You never see them trying to prepare food with a 5 year old running around the kitchen with blood streaming down his face or your 7 year old practising the tin whistle in the backround.

Come on lads add a bit of reality, make a mess, allow us to see the mountain of pots and dishes in the backround, curse a bit when you can't find the pasta maker make it real.

Now for the sinister bit, as you all know I have waged a one man crusade against Mr Chris deBurgh not because he is a bad person but because we must protect our children from the music, and I think he is weird. I sat down a half an hour ago and put on Ready Steady Cook to see if there was anything new that I could learn.

They had Ronan (my voice will annoy the saints in heaven) Keating as a guest and Chris ( I am making a comeback whether you like or not, and I have healing hands)de Burgh as guests. Will my torment never stop? not only do I have to put up the perfection I must now endure two of the most cheesey, smarmy, feckers to walk this planet. Why could they not have asked deBurgh to put his healing hands over Keating's fish and bring it back to life, that would have been worth watching.

I wonder if you can apply for compensation or a reduction in the TV Licence for watching this?