Having already become irrelevant, David Cameron, has now started to turn invisible. .

Miss Bournemouth gives a speech during the party conference pageant finale.....

Alistair Darling, the Chancellor, pictured out on the town at the weekend with Marina from the cult sixties TV show, Stingray. Gossip column note: don't they make a great couple!

Since Easyspace was acquired by Iomart for £10.5M at the tail end of 2004 services have been in decline. One of the problems, and I speak as a user and customer of Easyspace since the 90's, has been in their outsourcing of support services to India. When support was based on shore in Byfleet, Surrey, the technical response and customer service experience, was always spot on. 

This Thursday I contacted Easyspace support with a very simple problem to resolve. I had tried, unsuccessfully, to renew five of the domains in my stable with a debit card, as I have been doing, for what must be now almost ten years. 

The response I got back on my support ticket, time stamped 4:33am (about 9am local time India) claimed "Debit Card is for Monthly Customers Only.", and prompts me to follow a link about payment methods which goes on to explain about direct debits. 

My query had asked "I have tried to renew these [domains] on three separate occasions, even using different debit cards but I keep getting the same message - unable to process at this time."....

Iomart is a public company. You expect an appreciation of the difference between a debit card and a direct debit, but there isn't one. Perhaps this is an outcome of not properly managing an outsourced function, where you end up getting a customer response which begins "this is the wrong answer".

Of course, since last year I have been migrating all my services away from Easyspace, ever since I had been encouraged / miss-sold an upgrade to a dedicated server with a rubbish Plaxo control panel. In fact, this is the reason I registered the domain, reallyannoyshit.com and started this blog. Over a year later and this company are still annoying the s... out of me, and are still getting it wrong.

Just in case you might have cycled into this tree, Surrey County Council had the foresight to put chevron markings around it....

His expression said it all.....

The packaging boasts "it is like food you might cook yourself". This is true if you like to cook plates of jellied meat. Did I say meat? A closer look at the packaging reveals the meat is actually only 4%, so if you are planning a dinner party with a main course of jellied meat be sure to spend time on your marketing, so you can really give the dish a positive spin when you unveil it to your guests. What's the other 96%? Who cares, if anyone asks distract them with a cute kitten. It's an old marketing trick, works every time.

The annual food festival at Emsworth, an old fishing village on the South Coast, took place again this weekend and attracted an estimated 55,000 visitors. This is simply too many to pack into such a small, beautiful space, considering normal motor senses and awareness of others is either completely turned off or is dramatically reduced. People think with their stomachs and behave very unexpectedly. This includes coming to a complete stop in the middle of a pedestrian flow to hunch over and shovel food into their mouths. If you have a pushchair or a wheelchair or small kids the stress of trying to move through the crowd in one piece is too great, best to retreat to the river to feed the swans.

Gordon Brown, in his first speech to the TUC as prime minister, arrived on stage dressed as a pantomime cow. Not having the social skills of his predecessor, Tony Blair, critics have long advocated he find new ways to be creative in engaging with UK voters.

Of course, this prop had a dark undertone, in the shape of the pink udders. They gave the appearance of being able to produce milk (as in "jobs for Britons"), but in the end they are just part of a costume he can unzip and climb out of..

The hideous Autumn migration of large ugly spiders has begun. There you are sitting quietly on the sofa on a lazy weekend afternoon watching Back to the Future when you're distracted by the freak racing across the floor on his eight legs.

This happened so quickly I didn't have time to get my camera out. In the afternoon, a man, unbelievably, walks out of a kebab shop carrying a live mouse by the tail. He stoops down and lets it free by the kerb where it quickly takes shelter under a parked car. The man, smiling to himself, goes back inside, presumably waiting for customers or to examine the doner on its rotating spit.

Ken Livingstons observation in June that the Olympic logo "will grow on you" took on a new meaning this week when shocking images revealed in The British Medical Journal pictured a man from Croydon with a 2012 shaped rash on his abdomen.

I should have known better when the doors opened. I really should have got a taxi home last night rather than getting on the tube with this bunch of ........

"Boo Hooo, there's no one waiting for me......"

Widely reported in the press this week, Chelsy Davy, has a strop at the airport as Prince Harry wasn't there waiting for her.

Gordon Brown doesn't flinch as he's hit by a blue beachball . This new office sports craze called faceball, originated at Flickr, arrived at this mornings cabinet meeting amid great ministerial humour. 

Now in production in China, the London mayoral robots...........

Two things disturbed me about the recent Rolling Stones concert at the O2. The first being that Greenwich Council will not fine either Keith Richards or Ronnie Wood £50 for smoking on stage at the venue on the basis that no one at the concert complained about it. It would seem as if the smoking ban doesn't actually apply as long as no one complains. Does it set a precedent? Could landlords display signs like "this is a smoking pub" and have their  patrons agree. What exactly was the point of introducing the ban if it isn't applied? Isn't this just another message to the UK that you can get away with anything?

The second thing that disturbed me was someone describing the event (of them lighting up) as "being a great rock 'n' roll moment" (Evening Standard 22/08/07). Now pardon me for being a purist, but how does this non event compare to Ozzy Osbourne biting the head off a bat?

When a friend of mine was trying to sell his house he de-cluttered into mine in true Anne Maurice style. This was a few years back, and believe it or not I still have a load of his junk in my garage. I can't even put my car in there as there's a dish washer, a plastic garden dining set, a wooden book case, four louvered doors, a lamp stand, a telephone book, a garden shears, "didn't they do well?", and an assorted bunch of other rubbish you would never expect to see on the conveyor belt in the generation game, all obstructing my way. The clutter takes up just under half of my garage space.

For the first couple of years I didn't particularly care, he was doing up his new house, had a new baby and so on, but in April  I asked him to move it. I am still waiting, six months later, even though he has room in his own garage and has access to a van every day of the week.

Once, since, on a Friday, he sent me a text to say he had  the van and could collect that weekend. I figured, that's convenient for him.  I had asked him to collect the stuff on a week night after work. I am not usually there at the weekend. He had agreed, with the nights getting brighter, he could do it. I concluded he must have had the van for something else and it would have been convenient for him to collect at that time. I texted back to say I wasn't there, and when was he going to collect it, only to receive a text back saying "well, I have tried", referring to this single attempt. It was then that words like "piss" and "taking" started to spring to mind.

It's now September. The nights get shorter making it impractical for a week night collection and the junk is still in my garage. The next time someone asks me to store something I will certainly say no, and direct them straight to a self storage unit like the big yellow storage company.

I still wonder what to do with the junk in my garage. Pile it into a skip, except I lose again in having to pay for it. Have it delivered to his house and dumped in his driveway - again the cost is mine. What would you do, what would you recommend?