As a proud Cork man living in exile I beginning to find the reporting of the news in Ireland is lacking passion (gra), and frankly its beginning to annoy me so I have decided to take a story from RTE's Website and translate it into "Cork". Click on the RTE read the original post.

Knackers at it all Day in Mullingar

by Blacksheep

8 shams have been hauled up in front of court with something to do with a large scatter in Mullingar Co. Westmeath today,it happened after dinner. Initial reports indicate knackers are involved

6 knackers ,that were actually in court, fair dues to them, were charged with "acting the langer" with 2 others were charged with "acting the complete langer and flahing the situation all altogether".

All 8 were kept in so that they would reappear in Tullamore,s District court on Monday, with the help of god.

The wig Judge John Neilan was told by the law that the lads are alleged to have been involved in a fierce scatter altogether that took place at Dalton Park housing estate or Mullingar Reginonal Hospital, again, after dinner.

Its believed that the scatter was part of an ongoing row between 2 families.

Locals (non- knackers) said that they saw 30 knackers, f'#@king stones and other shite at each other in what was described as a "riot".

The law say that the scatter was caused by what they described as a "king of the tinkers-style fist fight",or a kick shit.

Residents (Posh locals) say that its been going on for months between the 2 families but only really kicked off today.

More than 20 law were at the scatter to tell people to "stall the balls and cool the emotions, before some-one loses an eye". They went to say that it was a fierce scatter altogether with over 100 lads getting stuck in.

One house damaged by the scatter has had a €5,000 grant claim entered to Westmeath Co. Council in order to have the front door "re-aligned".

Further hop-ons were reported ,again after dinner but before tea and before they all set off for a pint.

Now thats better its gets to the point and there is no "horseshite" about it.